Sunday 26 December 2004

The Eve Of Christmas Eve (Overexxagerated...but true)

24th of December 8:33AM: I woke up fully clothed (Including the hat and shoes) laying face up on a freshly made bed. This had ofcourse become a habit of mine, waking up in unknown locations with a very brief memory of where I was. My mobile phone was placed on the bedside table with little battery left. As my eyes helplessly gazed at it, I realised I had received new text messages. I looked at them hoping to find a clue to the happenings of the night before and I was successful. Messages of "Are you drunk phil?" , "Your Odd" and "What the fuck are you on!?!?" plagued my inbox. What did I send to these innocent individuals? I then realised I should check the sent messages. So I did, And I wasnt dissapointed to find the same strange text message sent to multiple people... "When I Drink Water It Makes Me Feel Like A Bong Or A Man Getting Kicks Out Of Inserting Ecstacy Tablets Into His Anal Sphincter. Why Is It...That When A Couple Are Engaging In Sexual Activity...It Is Always The Male Who Is Under Pressure To Pull Off An Outstanding Performance?"...Who in the correct state of mind would write such a fucked up thing? And Better yet...who would send it to 5 people on his fucking phone?? I put the phone back down on the side table and tried to make sense of all this shit. I felt tired and confused, so I rest my head on the pillow. Suddenly I heard a sound near the door, my head jolted towards the origin of the sound. Si had stepped outside of his room, was half naked... and was looking through the door. Jesus Christ man put some clothes on... you look like a fucking PRICK! Ofcourse...How could I have been so stupid...I had been at some sort of "Social Gathering" at Sis house again...but what had happened?

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23rd of December: It was a Thursday, A strange day to be frollecking round town but it was the Christmas holidays so it was all good. I went straight to Simons house as he had text me the night before asking If I was coming down,along with other random texts that sounded like he was on some sort fucked. When I arrived I came out with it. "Si..lets get to the point...were you a drunk fuck last nite?" "No" He said "I just took some blow" Innnnteresting. He proclaimed that it was a change as he hadnt taken it in a while. This suddenly gave me the craving. I hadn't smoked it myself since June. I had decided I didn't really want to smoke weed that much anymore. But this was Christmas and drink just wasn't happening anymore..it just left me with a really bad hangover and saying that "I would never do it again" which ofcourse we all do 2 days later. So as a last time before the new year I decided that I was going to smoke marijuana. I was going to phone one of my "connections" but I was in luck because Simon had some, so we went and smoked a few pipes. As Simon had the first draws, I sat there waiting in anticipation for my turn. As he passed the pipe over, a smile crept upon my face, like a young child opening a presents on Christmas morning. I inhaled the shit. and then coughed my fucking fucking guts up. Si laughed. Ofcourse I hadnt properly smoked in 6 months so I had born again virgin lungs, but that didnt stop me. I got used to it and kept on smoking it until there was none left...yes...I remembered this feeling. We emptied the pipe and stored the excess shit to leave no evidence. We walked in to the living room, the TV had been left on and I was about to encounter the first experience of the day. On the TV there was a programme with talking animals underwater. Sharks,Dolphins,octopuses...they were talking. I was laughing like fuck. Its amazing how this exact programme was on at this exact time. When you are stoned you start to realize just how ridiculous everything really is. I have very little remembrance of what happened for a few hours. Briefly we smoked more pipes,Watched the move Gremlins and I had the munchies fucking bad...I ate like fuck. The entire day I had consumed a subway meal,a chinese,an entire chocolate cake,Pringles and some random stuff in Si's kitchen. I also kept on farting to the disliking of the other people in the house at the time which were Cory,Mercer, Louise and Lois, not to mention Si N Jay.....Then Blackie came along. I went to up Blackies house and listened some hip-hop, he bought some beers to take back..half of which I smashed because I was so stoned and carrying a bag. But we just laughed. Then he kept on freaking me out saying we were being chased by soldiers with guns..Why was he being a dick? Was he doing it for his own amusement? Or revenge for breaking his bottles? When We got back I smoked a joint and then shared a few more pipes with blackie when we were upstairs listening to some mixtapes he leant me. We then found a bottle which appeared to be cider...but was actually filled with piss . He kept on throwing at me and we just laughed about it some more. After that...I cant seem to remember what happened...Somehow I managed to get to Jays bed...and passed out...