Fuckin Clipboard People

Anyone else out there hate them???? A certain main street where I walk in my lunchtimes is ALWAYS clogged with them - every day of the week. We never get a "day off" from them! Mondays it's the Shelter people, Tuesdays it's Save the Children, Wednesdays its Oxfam, Thursdays it's Amnesty International, and so on. Their tactics are guerilla-like - they flank the streets, one either side, and spread out the whole length of the street, funnelling you closer and closer into their trap. They are normally made up of enthusiastic fuckwits earning about £7 per hour too, which is nearly more than what I earn so that's reason enough to hate them!! The thing that REALLY makes me want to twat them in the face is the tactics they try to use to make you stop.They catch your eye as you walk along, slowly moving away from them and hoping that they ignore you, then they take a few steps towards you, smiling sweetly, then some of them stand on one foot, lean over and kind of windmill their arms at you as they say "hi, got a few minutes to chat?" . I even had a guy a few weeks ago who started mimicking roping me in... I mean, WTF? Do you realise what a complete dick you look like, standing there balancing away and inviting me to push you over into the nearest puddle? The worst ones are the ones who try to follow you or call after you, making people stare and you feel like Scrooge of the New Millennium. Have you ever signed up for something because these people make you feel guilty/selfish/stingy? Are these the emotions they rely on stirring up in you, to make you sign on the dotted line? Is that a totally unfair way of getting money out of people? YES I THINK SO!!! A lot of the time I want to stop and tell them to their faces that I wanted to join Oxfam/Amnesty/Greenpeace/etc then I'd go to the website and join up for free, thus avoiding paying them commission - I'd rather all my money went to the charity, and not a percentage of it going to pay their wages so they can carry on harrassing people. I'd also love to say to them "do you realise what a cock you look standing there like that" but I refrain . "But at least they're working" you bleat - well I don't care! They are IRRITATING! There's too many of them! They make me feel guilty as I walk briskly past with a firm "No Thank You"!!!